Quiet Times

Not a lot of posts lately, the voices in my head have been fairly quiet. I’ve got a lot of things going on, and I’m happy and that’s that.

I’m working on a couple different work things, which I like. My company’s new site (which I designed) just launched and I’m pretty happy with the results.

I ran 11 miles, last week, which puts me very close to my 30×30 half marathon distance. And it was great because I ran it thinking I was only going to run 10.

Via M, I found this super great tennis charity program for kids in Brooklyn, and I got right into the middle of teaching the kids on Saturday. And I think I did a pretty good job – the other teachers said so too. And I got to play a solid few hours of tennis against some really good players.

Then of course there is R, who is just about the best possible thing I could ask for. I could write all about why he’s so great – but you probably don’t want to read that – so I’ll leave it at this: You know what’s nice? When someone wants to take your photo. When someone is like hold on, you look so cute… It’s hard to explain, but it’s really nice. Happy me below: (365-days of skirts project still in full effect)

R and I recently booked tickets to the Bahamas for my birthday in July. 🙂 Super great, is that the place has internet so technically I’ll be working. And I might use my week of vacation afterwards, so we can stay abroad and travel some more.

And I’m really happy for him that his life is going in the direction he wants it to. Life is easy. Life is good. I hope you, dear reader, are happy too.

Quiet Times

Life Decisions

Tonight I got to catch up with my friend A. We haven’t talked in a long time and it was really nice to see him. He’s in town right now because he’s in between a rock and a hard place – a place that a lot of us late-20 something year olds are going through. He’s unsure about his school program, unsure about his job prospects. His long-term girlfriend is doing well at her school program, and as the days go by, is getting more and more assertive about the whole marriage thing. He loves her, loves her, loves her, but is just unsure about the whole “forever” part. It’s a scary thing, intimidating.

A and I talked about it, and my best advice to him was that whichever way it goes, is the way it’s meant to go. He will have a good, happy life regardless of what happens. The fact that he was taking the time and putting in the effort to deal with this now, showed that he was trying his best to do the right thing, whichever way it happens. I can respect that.

We got talking some about what happened with Adam and I over the summer, which was nice. He had met Adam before and I talked to him some about our relationship, before the whole debacle. For whatever reason, most people tend not to ask me about it anymore, but time helps add new perspective and I like hearing what other people think. He told me that I didn’t deserve what Adam did. And I found that very comforting. I really didn’t deserve it. I suffered the backlash of a selfish person. Bad things do happen to good people. The fact that I am resilient, the fact that I came back from it, shows how strong I am, but in no way justifies what he did.

A also told me that there are plenty of men out there that would think I’m great and worthy enough to never lie to me. And I believe that — both parts, that I am great and worthy, and that there are men out there who don’t have to lie, who know how to man up.

I told A that I was happy. Sure I wonder what if this and what if that, but either way, I am happy with my life and what I’m doing. I think back to what I wanted last summer–someone to live with; someone to marry and have kids with eventually. And I realized I can still have all those things. But the hikes in Oregon and Georgia, the shooting ranges in Georgia, the drunken karaoke in Chicago, the crepes in Alabama and NYC, Rocky Horror burlesque in Seattle, the gym with D, the quality time with my niece and nephew, I never would have gotten do any of those things. This isn’t the life I was planning, but it is equally good if not better.

Life Decisions