Role Model

And this is how I want to live my life:

The prolific and popular French novelist Aurore Dupin was better known by her pseudonym George Sand. Few 19th-century women matched her rowdy behavior. She wore men’s clothes, smoked cigars, was a staunch feminist, and frequented social venues where only men were normally allowed. Yet she was also a doting mother to her two children, and loved to garden, make jam, and do needlework. Among her numerous lovers were the writers Alfred de Musset, Jules Sandeau, and Prosper Mérimée, as well as composer Frederic Chopin and actress Marie Dorval. Her preferred work schedule was midnight to 6 a.m., and she often slept until 3 p.m. “What a brave man she was,” said Russian author Ivan Turgenev, “and what a good woman.” Her astrological sign? The same as you and me. She’s feisty proof that not all of us Crabs are conventional fuddy-duddies. In the coming weeks, she’s our inspirational role model.

From the ever wonderful, Rob Breezy’s Free Will Astrology for the week of February 26.

Role Model

Love & Forgiveness

The spiritual work of being human is learning how to love and how to forgive.

– Kerry Egan, My Faith: What people talk about before they die

I like the above post a lot, and that quote stuck out to me. I’ve been dealt my share of hard blows in life — not worse or more than anyone else’s, but mine nevertheless — and I wonder if some people (me included) already know how to love, and so our spiritual growth comes from having to learn how to forgive. Loving is easy for me, forgiveness is not. And maybe it needs to be.

To Forgive

  • to stop feeling anger toward (someone who has done something wrong) : to stop blaming (someone)
  • to stop feeling anger about (something) : to forgive someone for (something wrong)
  • to stop requiring payment of (money that is owed)
Love & Forgiveness

Getting High

I was with people the other day, and they were talking about getting high. We all more or less agreed it’s not something we do too much at all anymore, or ever did, because a lot of the time, it’s not actually enjoyable. The next day I was running and about 5 miles in, hit that serene, the world is good, runner’s high. And it just got me thinking about the different types of high—we all want to get high, we all want to feel great, and we use different methods to get there. Why and which way is personally best?

Percentage I’m likely to enjoy my high:

80% Running
I don’t always get runner’s high when I run, but when I do, it is blissful. I feel clear-headed and happy. I feel like I’m connected to the world.

50% Alcohol
My friend told me I’m a happy drunk, which is good, I was going to rate this high like 75% but considering how often I’ve gotten stupidly black-out-drunk, sick from drinking, some of the things that I’ve done or been done to me while drinking, I’m knocking it down to 50%. It’s a toss up if the experience itself and the aftermath are going to be all good.

50% Food
Food doesn’t give me a huge high unlike some people (mostly foodies probably), so that lowers its score immediately. Add on the fact that I have food/weight issues, I don’t always get a lot of joy from food—and when I do, it’s not long-lasting. I definitely have a bad habit of overeating foods I love to the point where I love it a little less by my last few bites.

25% Marijuana
Nowadays I hardly smoke at all. And that’s mostly a result of never knowing how the high was going to affect me. I’ve had edibles a few times and each time they’ve knocked me on my ass–made me completely catatonic. So, bye bye edibles. I also found that smoking from a vaporizer usually gave me a better high — calmer, no paranoia — but I’m not enough of a user to buy myself a vaporizer, so access is an issue–knocking the enjoyment level down. This leaves me with regular smoking in some form and yeah, it’s a toss up on having a good time. So that’s how I get to 25%.

Seeing it laid out like this, it really makes my decision-making clearer. Certain things I really enjoy and get a great deal of satisfaction from and other things I don’t.

I’ll update this if I can think of other things I get high off of. Feel free to name some in the comments.

Getting High